Monday, December 5, 2011

The truth is plain to see - she was sent to rescue me.

There are times in your life where you feel forsaken. Where nothing is going right, in a big way. When desperate prayers go unanswered month after month. When you are convinced nothing good will ever happen again. Since December 23, 2008, that is how I felt. A little lost, a little desperate, insecure about the future and continuously wondering "Why, God? When, God?" Losing Webb was the

worst imaginable experience on Earth. Then I had a traumatic miscarriage 7 months later that left me, in some doctor's minds, completely infertile. I thought to myself, "Why wouldn't God want me to have more children?" I didn't feel like He owed me a child, but I was confused as to why future children seemed impossible. Yet, a small, still voice kept whispering, "Wait on me," everytime I asked Him if another child was in store for us. I begged Him to take the desire out of my heart if He did not want me to have another baby, but the desire remained. In January 2010 I was lead to LA, to a magnificent doctor who was able to remove the scar tissue caused by my D&C, scar tissue doctors in Atlanta seemed skeptical could be removed. I thought that surgery solved al my problems; I was wrong. After three chemical pregnancies, more research and more prayer, I was able to get the doctors here to diagnose what I suspected all along--- that the infection caused by the miscarriage/ D&C was still present. Again, I was led to a wonderful doctor, this time in New York City, who was able to use a special antibiotic treatment, and my infection was gone. Two months later, I was pregnant again. But after four failed attempts, I did not get my hopes up. But ultrasound after ultrasound, appointment after appointment, I felt a calmness in my heart. The doctors were on high alert, telling me I was "high risk," and even saying a few times they thought my prior issues were causing placenta problems. I remained calm, knowing in my heart everything was going to be ok. Then, on November 28 at 9:45 PM, my precious miracle was placed into my waiting arms, and I felt.....blessed. She weighed over 8 pounds, and had the most beautiful scream I have ever heard. I looked into her eyes and knew I would never be the same, this time, in a good way. Am I still sad over losing my precious Webb? Of course, maybe today even more than almost three years ago. I know he is his sister's guardian angel; I am just sad she won't get to meet him in this lifetime. Having this child does not replace the one I lost. It does not mean my fears are gone. But seeing this miracle of life, God's greatest blessing, gives us hope. Hope for a future that seemed shaky these past three years. Hope that we will make it, despite all the odds.

Bess Catherine Broach
November 28, 2011
9:45 PM
Eight pounds, Five ounces
19 3/4 inches


  1. We love you guys so much. Welcome to the world sweet, beautiful Bess. You have been loved and prayed for for a very long time.

  2. That was one of the most precious things I've ever read, Ash. Welcome to the world, Bess. We've been waiting for you! Adrienne

  3. My heart is swollen with love for you and your beautiful family! Congratulations on such a PRECIOUS, PRECIOUS gift from God.

  4. I have followed your story and I am so happy for this wonderful blessing. God bless you and your family.

  5. I love you, baby Bess!
    Aunt Polly

  6. OH WONDERFUL!!!! Thank you so much for posting pictures and the news about your baby Bess! I left a comment on Nov 5th on your last post and have just felt that there was good news coming!! Having followed your blog for almost 3 years, and praying for you, it is wonderful to see this great blessing after so much loss and suffering. I found your blog at the time that my daughter was going through similar sufferings and has lost 7 babies over these last few years. After much prayer and research she too just had a miracle baby on Nov 24! She was also seeing a specialist in NYC. We live on the west coast, so God really worked a great miracle in our lives too! Anyway, I just feel so happy for you and thankful to God for carrying you through it all. Blessings on you all!!!

  7. Congratulations on your sweet daughter. Love her name too. Blessings on your family as your journey continues.

  8. Oh Ashley, I read your post awhile back and keep meaning to sit and write to you...I cried as I read your post - your words so perfectly described what I imagine your heart would feel. I am so excited for your family and feel like God has completely had His hand on this sweet baby girl. I am sorry it was such a hard road to have her but all the more reason to rejoice in His blessing. I am thinking about you all a lot this holiday season and know it will be a roller coaster of emotions on your heart! Much much love and congratulations on sweet Baby Girl!!!
    love Katie

  9. I'm not sure if you remember me, but we went to law school together. Suzanne Presley told me about your blog and I have been following it for several years. I have prayed for you and your family. I haven't been on in quite some time and I just saw your last post and I am overcome with joy for your family! What an incredible blessing and your complete trust and faith in God is so inspiring. I will continue to keep you and your family in my prayers!